This comes up all the time, it's something that too many people dismiss too easily, and too many people agonize over too much, IMHO, when I feel that there's a subtle, but distinct, way of considering how a person approaches Intimate Ageplay, and which tells you profoundly important things about them -- and which can be seen as defining the "health" of a person's Ageplay orientation.

In general in life, I have a pretty Libertarian leaning -- I believe that for the most part, people should be free to pursue their own fulfillment however they need to, providing that the pursuit doesn't deprive someone else of their own fulfillment. Life's not always that simple of course, but that's a baseline priority I strive for.

But this issue (of Intimate Adult Ageplay versus those who use it as veiled pedophilia) impacts Biokids, the only truly helpless people in the world, who require the careful thought of decent people to protect them -- it requires some discriminating thought.

Firstly, it's simply a fact that many Innerkids feel a sexual connection to their emotional existence. So dismissing this reality as distasteful isn't realistic. It's a fact for many, many people in these worlds.

Secondly, it's simply a fact that there are vast numbers of guys out there who're aroused by various levels of veiled pedophilia, from the "schoolgirl fantasy" on down, who seek out "Ageplay" as a way to get away with getting off on being close to "children". Far more than most women realize, I believe, because they they know not to be blatant or extreme when talking about it.

Many have asked (even Innergirls who're a bit confused about the overlap of their Innergirl and their sexuality), how can a Guardian have sexual Ageplay leanings without them being little more than veiled pedophilia?

If a "Daddy" likes to be sexual while treating, and thinking of, you as a "little girl", how is this not simply enacting pseudo-pedophilic  fantasy via the "loophole" of your chronological age?

Sadly, too often it is just that, IME. This genre attracts a LOT of guys who're just overjoyed to have found that there are women like you who will let him pretend you're a "little girl", and be sexual with you.

But that's not the case for all of us, and here's why you deserve to discard that sort until you find someone who has ethical sources of the sexual connection they might feel between your Innergirl and your adult sexuality:

There IS a way for him to help you feel like the little girl you want to inside, and to share a mutual sexuality you both might feel connected to that part of you as part of a healthy adult relationship, without it being about sexualizing a "child"...

Which is when the sexuality is all about the fact that you are an adult, and not a child.

Meaning, when a Daddy-type person's sexuality is about finding it arousing to treat you, a grown woman, as a child, then it is your inherent adulthood which is required at the core of that desire, and hence sexualizing a real child wouldn't work for him.

If his arousal is all about picturing you as a real child, if the core of his interest is all about you seeming to be a real child, then I'd call this a big yellow flag of worry about what I call veiled pedophilia.

If he needs to think of you as physically small, as a real child, and being sexual with you as if you were literally a child is part of what he gets from Intimate Ageplay, then this is not what we consider healthy sexual Ageplay around here.

If his arousal is all about the fact that you are a woman, and that he can fulfill your emotional needs by treating you (dressing, referring to, speaking to, etc) as a child -- but it's the dichotomy of the fact that you clearly are very much a woman to him physically that's arousing -- then this is an example of how healthy adult sexuality can mingle in a beautiful way with the emotional needs and therapeutica that you get from feeling emotionally "little".

This can be very hard, because those who understand the nature of the emotionally-real Innergirl know that it's most fulfilling and therapeutic for you to feel very much like a real child. Often you don't want to be reminded that you're a woman roleplaying as a child (or further, don't really think of yourself that way at all, but rather as a real child within the body which sadly has become an adult).

So staying in touch with the reality that you're a woman, an adult, who is being regressed, being "Daddied"/etc., and that you're NOT a woman, seems to lessen fulfillment for you...

Which is why it's SO crucial to find the right person to live this with, to not settle too quickly for guys that call themselves Daddy, and seem good at treating you like a child -- especially if your Innergirl does have a connection to your adult sexuality. For you to be ethically safe to settle completely into Littlespace, and feel completely like a child in a sexual relationship, this has to be a guy, a "Daddy"-figure, whom you know is finding all of his arousal from the fact that you're a *woman*.

I've spoken with many women who, for example, lament some of the physical reminders of their adulthood when they're seeking the ultimate depths of Littlespace.

In other words, we feel that there's a difference between sexual "Ageplay" which is all about trying to make it seem as realistically as possible like someone is being sexual with a child, and sexual Ageplay which is about treating a grown woman as if she were a child.

It might seem a subtle difference, but it's a potent difference.

One orientation starts from the psychological foundation that you are a woman, a grownup, and to that it adds roleplay that's about treating an adult woman as a child.

The other orientation begins with the foundation of trying to make you seem as realistically like a true child, and then adds on sexuality to that "child".

Many, many Innergirls have found heartache mistaking the second kind of guy for the first, and it's my humble opinion that thinking about this seemingly-subtle difference can save a great deal more heartache.

--UB